Coming out to the band.

I've gigged a few times with some other gay performers. There's something going on behind the scenes with these bands that I don't understand... but I think it's "drama"... but first... lets go back for a moment...

I've been in "bands", "Projects", "jams".
Started right out of High School... going "Full Time" for 18 months . Then after that was the wedding band.
I miss the wedding band that consumed me for 30 years.
The players were all great. We had enough gigs that we had to turn many down.
After I told the band of me coming out, the band split up.... "supposedly".
Then after about 18 months, I got a call from the drummer asking me if I knew any Bass Players?
He had the fuckin balls to tell me the band is back together, and they were desparate for a bassist.
I hung up on him.
I found out who the guitarist was. It was my "Sub"... the guy who took my place when I was sick, or out of town.

So now I have to re-image myself all over again to a new market... Tough to do in a market. how many gay "musicians" do you know?
Elton John... Melissa Ethridge... keep going... .... ....
Maybe it's my attitide... a little bitter...
I try hard at auditions to do well. I've nailed 4 straight auditions in a row.
To me it's like riding a bicycle. It's not hard... the hardest part is knowing the style their looking for.
I can ride a bike, tho I do not do "Stunts". I'm not an agressive cyclist. I just ride, keeping up the pace... pass when I can... stop like I'm supposed to... just like playing a guitar.
I'm not a "Stunt" player... I'm not agressive... I don't "Shred" I dont play like "Vai" or Satch".
I just play and I think well for most "Pop" gigging situations.
I can't audition for everyone... sorry... my age prevents me... If I was 30 again, I'd be be knocking on many doors.
When you're over the big 5...0.... your chances for work is very slim... just like in the real world... sigh...

Being a regular gigging musician for 3 decades was one of my all time favorites.
Having a bad gig was better then a good day at work.
I'm not counting working at the music store for 2 years... but gigging was and is allways the best.
.... Of course I was straight all that time.....
even being out... it's the greatest...